Let The Blood Run Free

Carmene was screeching like a banshee, her arms were flailing uncontrollably. "Ive been shot - I'm dying, dying do you hear me. Oh farewell cruelle cruelle worldddd"

Everyone was now in a state of shock, screaming and crying - except of course for Dirk who was used to maintaining one's composure in a crisis.

"Carmene, stop, stop, let me see" shouted Dirk

"No, no - its too late" shrieked Carmene

Dirk took control, he pinned Carmene down. "Shandy, help me, whilst I hold her, check her out, where is she wounded".

Shandy rushed to Carmene's side, noting the blood was staining her hip region which was being obscured by a rather cheap and tawdry faux Chanel quilted white vinyl shoulder bag. Pulling it aside she had a closer look.

"Ummmm the "blood" seems to be oozing from your handbag not your body darlin"

Quickly unzipping it Shandy gasped in relief. "You stupid, stupid queen, what the hell are you doing with a Razz in your bag"

"WHAT" replied Carmene. Its my Razz. I'm not shot, I'm not dying"

"Unfortunately not" replied Iva

"Oh well thats ok then" said Carmene sitting up and snatching her bag. Opening it whilst cursing under her breath she plucked a tissue from within and lamely tried to dab the stain off her 100% synthetic frock. "I got at the 7 Eleven to have later if you must know"

"Don't ever pull a stunt like that again you dumb moll" said Iva

"Why don't you shut your face - bitch"

"Enough" said Dirk "You are all extremely lucky to get away with your lives. Claire is not to be messed with, she is a very dangerous woman. Shandy I cannot believe you thought up this scheme. Its bad enough endangering yourself, but to involve others is fool hardy".

Shandy flicked her hair nervously, trying to conceal her embarrassment. Dirk was right, what was she thinking.

"I'm so sorry - I don't know what I was thinking. I was just so angry" said Shandy trying to look Dirk in the eye.

He reached for her hand "I don't know what I would have done if I'd lost you"

Everyone fell into silence.

"OH MY GAWDDDDD" said Iva "What about that box. Whats in it"

Shandy had a suspicion. Rummaging in her hand bag she located the key, the key that had fallen from the smashed Penis of Morty Hempel.

"NO - do you think it will open the box" said Carmene in a non believing tone

"Not sure - I just have a hunch"

She put the key into the lock - turning it gently as it went click.

Shandy looked at everyone "Its opened it, I don't believe it, shit".

As she lifted the lid, the jewels glistened seductively.

"Whats in there, what is it" said Iva

"For chrissakes Iva give the woman a second" snapped Carmene "So whats in there".

"Its an envelope, thats it"

Iva rolled her eyes "Open it for gods sake"

Shandy's hands shook as she peeled open the envelope. Inside was a single peice of paper.

"Let me see, whats this all about. It looks like some sort of certificate" Her eyes flashed over the document "How bizarre, its a birth certificate. FUCK - its my birth certificate" Shandy flushed with nerves as she studied it closely.

"Read it out" said Iva

"Its embarrassing - its got my birth name, my male name. Oh well, I don't have any secrets. Its got my fathers name Augustus William Cottonwood"

"COTTONWOOD" snickered Carmene. Shandy raised an eyebrow, she stopped instantly.

Shandy continued "And my mum, Bessie Eudola Cottonwood and there is my name Delwood Hickory Cottonwood"

This time everyone broke into laughter, Dirk included. Shandy shot him a glare

Dirk tried to stop laughing "Delwood!"

"Enough you lot, thats a respectable Southern name I will have you all know" hmph "Wait" Shandy said "There's more, hang on, what? There is another name - geezus - get out of town"

"WHAT" said everyone in unison

"It seems I have a twin sister, a certain person by the name of Prissy Louella Cottonwood"

Shandy dropped the paper - she was gazing blankly not knowing what to make of it all. So many unanswered questions. Why did she not know of this sister. Did her parents give her up for adoption. Was she alive. Where did she live and most importantly - what was Claire doing with the birth certificate.